Before meeting a potential landlord, I take a look in the mirror

For Louisiana Illuminator, “I’ve been on two housing hunts since March 2020, and at every turn I was aware a landlord could discriminate against me.”

After driving around trying to find the address, I park my car. I don’t have to stop and check in the mirror or untangle curls from earrings. But at this point, I do it reflexively and catch myself being… not quite myself. When I step out, my heel lands flat on the ground. That’s a strange sensation, but it pales in comparison to the lead up to this drive and this meeting. Because, for lack of a better phrase, I have “de-tranned” myself.

“Mr. Adams! Good you could make it.”

And there’s always a pause, like the person knows something they said, or something about me is not quite right.

“…would you like to see the house?”

I walk forward, up the stairs, and hope I can talk, show off my intellect, and use the “right” gestures to make up for whatever this person, this landlord, thinks of me.

It’s terrifying losing housing in a pandemic. I’ve been on two housing hunts since March 2020, and in both cases I was aware at every turn that Louisiana allows a landlord to legally discriminate against me for my gender presentation. Each call, each meeting, was a gamble.

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